Archive | November 2013

A Momentary Thrill

Ever had a certain “socially awkward” habit that you’ve developed over time which comes due to exposure to a certain environment? It’s placed neither here nor there, but it gives you a momentary thrill. Well, in my time at International House, I developed one. I had never done it before, but the power of the shutter right before the elevator doors are flang open and someone checks in, that’s something. A sly one, because sometimes it would make me want to lock someone out of the elevator so that I can take a selfie. I would be that girl who enters the elevator and should I find myself alone, I am so tempted to run to the ‘><‘ button so that I can have the elevator all to myself *evil grin*. Yes, elevator selfies (note that, ‘selfie‘ is now a universally accepted word, in the English dictionary), I didn’t post them on social media, but well I guess now I am.

Elevator Selfies

I just thought, I can’t have all these selfies and do nothing with them (or delete them after all that effort I invested), hence the collage. Of course I’m not that lucky enough to find myself in an elevator alone, but there’s once I happened to have 2 other colleagues who shared in my “thrill” and welcomed the idea, and we had a group elevator selfie. Such an achievement. By the way, if you’re getting worried, I’m not insane (or is that what insane people say? LOL). What’s your “socially awkward” habit? That one that gives you the momentary thrill? Do you dance in the elevator, make conversations with your alter ego or imaginary crush, make funny faces…

I’m sure we all have that thing we do when we think no-one’s watching. While at it, did you know part of your (if not all) character is made up by what you do when you think no one else is watching. In case you didn’t know yourself, just observe, check yourself out, what do you do when no one’s looking out for you. Now, that’s you. I came to accept myself for who I am.

Have a superb week lovelies!

 Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*      

A Little of Everything…

The other day, we went to pick my mum up from the airport. The anxiety, the joy within, was just in excess. I couldn’t wait to see her stroll out of the arrivals entrance. The boyfriend must’ve been tired of hearing, “I can’t wait to see mum”. I mean, we woke up at 1 in the AM to go see her arrive. My dad was in awe I think, he’d even called beforehand to confirm that I’ll be there or it was just excitement (read ‘cheap talk’). He would have bet there’s now way I’m waking up to go hang out in the cold. You’d think she was away for years, but she’d been away for just one month. Just one month and we were all thinking or rather feeling that she’d been away for too long. Wouldn’t want to imagine if she’d gone for any longer. My baby sister, who likes her space was feeling mum-sick, she would call me and tell me how she misses her. My dad who’s purported to be the “hardcore” was calling her up everyday and when he doesn’t, he texts to check up. I didn’t over do it, like the other two, but if I wasn’t talking about her, I was sending her some inbox messages, telling her how much I miss her. We wanted her to enjoy the trip and for my cousins, aunty and uncle to have a piece of her as well.

The whole experience was ridiculously amazing and an eye opener too. We all discovered how mum is important in our lives. And for each of us, it was different because we had our own reasons. But at the end of the day, it’s her presence that matters(ed) the most to all of us.

You know that saying, “you don’t know what you’ve got until you lose it”? Well, you don’t have to wait till you lose it. You can know the value of what you’ve got while you still have it. Strive to retain that knowledge of how much value that thing brings you and appreciate whatever it is while it’s still here.

ION, remember me hoping that I bag it, I did bag it *whoop whoop*! It’s a great opportunity in an entirely different sector. It’s more than exciting, but let’s keep it together. Who would’ve ever thought I would work in a bank? I swear, that thought had never ever crossed my mind, I mean, they wear suits everyday. To the extent that when the opportunity presented itself at first, I was sceptical about going for it, plus the thought that I had no banking experience whatsoever. Then the opportunity presented itself a 2nd time, people had faith me (more than I did in myself), and it made me think, if they do, why not? I gave it a thought, read it through it and saw that what they were describing was what I do and what I’d love to do. God sure has  a way of surprising us, when you least expect it. I think it’s his way of showing us, he runs this world. He can put you in a place you least expect, he can make you cross paths with people you never thought you would.

The hardest part in this new experience and change, is that I’ll have to completely change my wardrobe. I only wear suits for interviews (which come once in a blue moon), but now they’ll become a daily wear *cringe*. Monday through Friday, someone shoot me now. It’s exciting and scary at the same time. I’ll have to go shop, which is not one of my favorite pass time activities. Can you imagine, I really don’t like shopping . There, I said it! I only love shopping when it’s impulse or when I’m sad because then I’ll buy the most fancy but irrelevant things. But when I have to do it, with a purpose, it’s devastating. I don’t get what I want or I have search endlessly to get it. I need your prayers or better yet, your help in shopping or new hand me downs (size 8 going 10, the food is settling in)  LOL *wink*. For real, any takers?

QUOTE OF THE WEEK

Steve Maraboli, Encouragement, Monday

One of those to take or talk you through the week as we go through our different situations, good or bad. May you have an easy breezy one. Happy Birthday to all November baby’s!

Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*

Better Than You Say or Think?

We have that tendency of thinking of ourselves lesser than what we actually are; be it in looks, appearances, accomplishments, abilities. Very few people would describe themselves as they are, because we tend to see more of the negatives than we do the positives in ourselves. Sometimes we feel like maybe you haven’t quite accomplished much or what you have managed to accomplish shouldn’t be said out loud because you feel like it’s just not enough. You could do better, because others have done better. Or you feel like maybe there are untold standards that have been set by others that you haven’t met. And everyone expects you to be or act in a certain way and you’re not to, so you look down on yourself. Confidence levels lurk and that prevents you from being the best you or even offering others the best of who you are or what you have.

I have felt that a couple of times myself, no lie. Where you enter a room and you just shrink in because well, the people in the room in your mind look better than you in one way or another. And that gets drilled into my mind, not because I’m any bad myself, but because I choose to look at myself that way. From there hence forth, for some reason everything goes downhill. It makes you question so many things, you don’t have a good time, at all. Nothing is exciting because you’re so cautious whether you’ll say the right thing, whether you’ll fit in, whether that’s the right forum for you.

It’s all in your mind. What you think of yourself, is all in your mind. Try see yourself the way others would see you. Don’t be too hard on yourself. Your chubby or protruding cheeks, your nose pointed or flat, your hair long or short, those freckles or laugh lines, your wide grin, your height or weight,  that’s just you. That’s your representation. Considering that when someone approaches you, even before you utter a word, those are the first things they see. There are people who see those things as your best assets, even when you don’t. The little who don’t, well, they don’t really matter. Maybe the best thing would be to be happy and confident in who & what you are. If you feel who you are or what you have is not enough, manage the little, then work towards more. But people, they smell fear, discomfort, and all those things don’t bring out the best of you. They act as repellents. Yet, we all work towards attracting others.

I watched this video and it hit the point home. Those 2 ladies, they didn’t do themselves any justice as they described how they look to the artists. It’s the other person, who’d just met them for a moment, who appreciated them more than they did. He saw the better version of them. Why wouldn’t you see the better version of you?

“Be snazzy in your skin”

Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*

Friday Snippets

Interesting week this one, but in an extremely good way. Let me not delve much into it, don’t want to jinx it. However, let’s talk professions. I am the poster child for social media/content and basically most things digital. It’s amazing how people perceive that, well, I’ve gotten the “she’s the one who does our Facebook and Twitter”. Basically, I have been downgraded to ‘just that’, those things that everyone else in the office thinks is a way to pass time. Good thing, they get a teeny-weeny section of what I do, like 0.something% but I don’t interject. I just nod my head and agree, because trying to explain it when the other party isn’t getting it, makes me seem defensive, which I really am sometimes *who isn’t?…I admire you*.

The best thing that’s happened the better part of this year, is having people who understand what I do. Or rather having a conversation with people who get me, who get my profession. It gives me some more confidence, that was rather lacking. You know when you’re a programmer, designer, lawyer, doctor, teacher,everyone knows what you do. I mean, its general knowledge. But content, what the hell’s that, what do you do?

I had a conversation with my dad yesterday trying to explain to him as simply as I could, what I do. And I mean in a very simple way, no jargon lingo. He’s old folk, so for him all these social media and content platforms don’t make sense. I broke it down, and based on the responses – mmmh’s, aaah’s, contributions, suggestions, opinions, I think he finally got it. I think he’s always had a hard time explaining to his friends what I do, at least mum got it some time back. Despite me having an undergraduate and masters degree in IT and Strategic Management, my work well, doesn’t quite capture those two in terms of my “titles”, so he wonders.

My Take: Be qualified, but don’t let your qualifications limit what you can do with yourself. You could study IT, like I did, but you could also be a greater cook. So that shouldn’t prevent you from being a super chef because someone said when you do IT you have to be a programmer. You don’t have to conform, respect your desires too.

TGIF, Hammock, Holiday

Thank God It’s Friday: If I could teleport that hammock, I would.

WATCHING

Scandal Ssn3 and Suits Ssn3. But honestly, I have been watching and 30mins into it I am dead asleep on my couch. Getting home feeling exhausted with the hope of watching a few episodes only to watch one episode all week. Feel me, does this happen to you?

LOVING

My friends, the support is overwhelming. For looking out for me, I have nothing but appreciation for you and if I can, I will always be there cheering you on too. In whatever ventures you take, as long as they’re legal and I think they suit you. Of course, I won’t cheat you can sing when you can’t, I can’t bear seeing you getting embarrassed on Project Fame. I will recommend you where I see you fit to do the work. But the bottom line is, I appreciate you.

LISTENING TO

Jam’s that are making my Friday a bit more interesting. I should probably make a playlist.

READING

Still blog-trotting! My sister also gave me this book, that now seems rather interesting. The title got me off at first but I decided to give it a benefit of doubt. Trying to live by the words, “don’t judge a book by its cover” … literally! Will tell you how that goes.

Books, Current Read,

EATING

My one meal a week, shame! But that’s what it has gotten to. I wouldn’t call it laziness but I happen to cook a lot and it seems endless or maybe I’ve performed miracles and I don’t know. That brings me to the question, do you think Jesus knew he had super powers or he came to realize later. Let me not get into it, lest it sounds blasphemous.

Food, Ugali, Pork, Fried, Vegges, Sukuma Wiki, Greens, White Chocolate

LOOKING FORWARD TO

Holidaying! Whenever it comes, I’m just craving that sun and sand. After being exposed to what a holiday would feel like for just a weekend, I am definitely looking forward to the next one. This stuff is addictive. Just thinking of the hammocks right about now.

HOPING FOR

Crossing fingers and toes that I bag it. It would be a great one to put my brains on.

SAVING FOR

A good blender. I want to be able to make my own shakes and juices, there’s no need for the disappointments we get from the restaurants. Plus for trips, we need to visit our country, it has the most beautiful sceneries and locations, those resorts won’t pay for themselves *pouts*

THANKING

God. These blessings, I can’t complain at all.

QUOTE OF THE DAY

Work Quote

Besides that, to more laughing, living and loving. Let your weekend be nothing short of interesting, blessings!

Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*

Outgrowing Them

I have become good friends with my tailor lately. Why, you ask? No, we don’t have much to talk about, unless it’s about how he’s going to adjust my clothes to fit me. The manufactures actually leave some allowance for that, I found out. It’s funny how I can’t see the weight I’ve gained or rather I’m ignoring it, but my clothes, well, they are just becoming tighter, you can’t beat that. It’s like trying to ignore a kid screaming to your ear as you try to sleep. It’s in the extra inch on my hips or thighs or chest or waist. I’m outgrowing them. I don’t want to accept that. I’m the kind that still wears clothes from 10 years ago, believe it or not, I don’t change much. But I am growing and I can’t stop my body from shaping itself. This also means a dent to my wallet because I find myself having to either adjust some clothes to fit or just buy some new ones.

Source

Source : This looks like me when I decide to fit clothes I haven’t worn in a long time. The disappointment.

Adjust, because that attachment with the old clothes for some reason comes on strongly when you realize you can’t wear them any more. While before, they would sit in the closet gathering dust . Some feel like vintage, and they are getting into fashion once again. My suit pants *wails*. I discovered that most of my suit trousers don’t fit (tight on certain areas), the coats fit perfectly but the bottoms, good Lord. More depressing when I think I have to get others while I have this ones (this is where my good tailor comes in). The needs becomes greater when you realize you need to use them for certain “official” occasions.

That’s just me and my clothes, but we outgrow so many things. Some of which we even don’t know ourselves. It could be material things, people, work, name it. It gets to a point where you cannot stay as you were. It’s like you’re transforming or being morphed into something and it’s either you adjust those things to fit into your life or just let go of them so that you can acquire new things that fit into your current state. Such is life.

Don’t struggle to fit in where you’re not fitting in, into clothes too. It’s not a must you fit into everything, even life won’t let you, that’s asking for a bit too much. When times comes for you to move to the next step or size, get with it, that’s what living is about. It’s about allowing yourself to grow, to become a better version of you, one that you are comfortable with at every stage. After all, it’s for your own comfort. And what’s life without comfort, lemons perhaps. Bitter as it gets. With comfort, it’s lemonade on the go or a shot of tequila with the said lemon and salt to loosen you up, much better. I kid, don’t drink, I kid again, one shot is good, just one!

Outgrowing

Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*

Friday Snippets

Random Thought: There are two people, one is praying for the weather to be rainy or at least cold (my work mate). Another one is praying for it to be sunny or let’s even say warm (me). They both pray earnestly, with their different intentions as to why they want the weather to favour their situation. Two people are praying for the same job opportunity (knowingly or unknowingly), both have their reasons as to why they want that job, they put it forth and earnestly pray for the position because they are qualified for it. But in both cases, a choice has to be made and only one thing or one person can benefit at a time. It can either be rainy or sunny, and there’s only one position available. Who deserves it?

Thank God It's Friday

 Thank God It’s Friday  – Source

I’m imagining this is how God has a difficult time up there, trying to answer all our requests. But, I’m sure he’s got us all, one way or another. Maybe that’s why you’re told be to patient, even when there’s a storm and that’s not what you’d prayed for (someone else could be asking for it), the sun will eventually shine just for you.

WATCHING

Scandal Ssn3, I can’t explain this one because I believe it’s in your collection. Maybe we can discuss it. What’s with Olivia Pope and her undying weakness for Fitz, it’s really annoying how she’s crumples up when she’s talking to him. Does that say something about us women?

Suits Ssn5, still watching this one, I love legal stuff and the twists that come with it.

New Girl Ssn3, she’s not new any more, but it was a about a girl who landed herself some dude house mates. And they all have to accommodate each others weird habits. Oh and they’re weird.

2 Guns, about two detectives who are unaware of each others JD’s. One is C.I.A, the other is in military and they’re trying to set each other up but in the end … both walk away in slow motion with after a shoot out and blowing a car-full of $$$, and of course keep more to themselves *yawn* but it had some laughable parts.

… and lots of other boring movies; Summer in February, It’s not You, It’s Me, among others. I can barely recall the names. Nowadays it’s hard to find a good movie, it’s like searching for a needle in a hay stack, stress.

LOVING

New hair do. It makes me feel liberated of sorts, like some of the things I felt I couldn’t do, now I do. Like wearing dangling earrings, my beaded necklaces, basically I can embrace all the weirdness I have in my drawers. Kind of feels like a re-brand, I tell you.

LISTENING TO

Ah, John Legend’s – All of Me and Passenger – Let Her Go. Love is a beautiful thing people. If it’s genuine, it’s definitely beautiful. If it’s not, you’re probably in the wrong kind. Move along and find the beautiful kind. Did you see how many times I used ‘beautiful’ there, that’s the effect of its beauty…lol.

READING

Blog-trotting! The book I wanted to read (Americanah – Chimamanda Ngonzi Adichie) is currently out of stock in my book store and truth be told, I don’t feel like reading anything else *pulls a bitch fit*. So I’ve settled to blogs (educational and non-educational) for now, that’s my daily dose. There’s so much to learn, from how people think, write, express themselves, create, share and so on.

EATING

Healthy eating. Then that one meal you make at the beginning of the week, that you end up eating every other day of the week, because laziness is not a good thing. You just get home and all you want to do is abuse the couch and remote.

#foodie

#foodie

LOOKING FORWARD TO

More random travelesque weekends. Had more than amazing time last weekend, when le boyfriend and our couple friends were meant to meet for lunch but that quickly changed to an out-of-town shindig. The excitement was in excess. That’s so unlike me, because I worry about logistics, but damn! I would do that over and over again, to any place. It’s about the company and the destination, the rest, is just logistics.

HOPING FOR

And praying that my toiling life gets a little more interesting than it currently is. I feel a little suffocated, if you know what I mean. Happens to the best of us at some point.

SAVING FOR

A holiday! House Appliances! Shoes! Clothes! Basically, things! Is there any time money becomes enough? You know enough to fund your wants and desires. These wants are just endless, because say, I get a shoe now, I want another tomorrow, that’s pushing it, the next minute. Damn, this life!

THANKING

People for accepting me as I am, long hair, short hair. It’s my heart you know, not the hair. LOL, India Arie knew what she was singing about *I am not my hair*. But thank God, it didn’t backfire on me. Now let’s rock it! If you were thinking of doing it too, go ahead and do it! But please keep your spouse in the loop, don’t take their opinion for granted. Not all fancy surprises, especially hair surprises.

INVITING YOU FOR

Today’s Rupu’s premier of “Thor: The Dark World” happening at the Junction. You can find your way there in case you were thinking of an evening plan. They’re painting the town Green this November, they intend to make sure you’re not plan-less, so check the site for some good deals.

#rupudeals

#rupudeals

QUOTE OF THE DAY

Settle

Besides that, to more laughing, living and loving. Let your weekend be nothing short of interesting, blessings!

Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*

#Tujuane – A Viewers Perspective

Tujuane meaning “let’s know each other”, is a dating show that’s featured weekly on one of our TV channels. It’s actually a very great idea and probably a first of its kind in Kenya. It brings to light the Nairobi dating scene, staged or not there have been rumors. That’s more or less what happens when the cameras are not rolling anyway, so no problem how they choose to do it.

That’s actually one of the few local programmes I make a point to watch every week, throw in Churchill, Tusker Project Fame, Mother-In-Law, Tahidi High (if I get home early enough) and Wedding Show . I’m supporting local content, that’s my excuse and I stick to it. While I support it, I look forward to a better episode each week, but much to my dismay, it’s almost always the same. An incompatible couple or if they’re almost compatible, they’re too young to figure it out. Usually in campus or fresh out of campus, which has now gotten me thinking maybe I’m being eliminated as a target audience. It’s good to give some feedback from a viewer’s perspective. Being an avid one, it was about time.

Anyhow, if I was to be asked, I would have a few suggestions to add some spice to it, because I mean, I don’t want to stop watching it. Despite its shortfalls, it’s an interesting concept which gives me a chance to throw in some opinions of the couples (or coupling and first dates) on social media, that’s usually fun. Judging others on what, if you’re put on the spot for, you’d probably be worse. Then again, we’ve not. Plus they knew we viewers have our fair share of opinions when they were getting on it.

  • Feature older people too not just youngins; you know working people who at least engage in mature conversations that we ‘slightly older people’ can relate to as well. I think partying, drinking and sex is overrated now, there’s so much more to talk about on the 1st date. We want to hear and see how they handle it too.
  • Really vet the individuals before coupling; Look at their profiles, who they are, what they do, what they’re looking for, their background, their lifestyle, and their beliefs – in detail – even if it means you use some personality tests among others to match them. So that you can match the ‘couples’ appropriately to avoid the couples wasting each other’s time when it’s not necessary and ours too. That can be a total put off from the beginning. Like once you brought a complete Ghetto Guy and a complete Up Town babe – Communicate was so sore. For us viewers, it’s not a sight to behold, it makes you just want to flip channels, to something more beneficial or just hate.
  • Get rid of the lessons; I don’t understand why we have people giving us lessons on dating during the show. What to do and not to do. Isn’t it a bit too late? It makes the couples on the show look bad to say the least. It also makes it looks staged, such that you have new lessons every week. It’s either you have a ‘dating show’ or ‘how to date talk show’. Which you could think of.
  • Revisit the individuals; Find out if there’s anything that developed after the show or that was just it and why and show us that as the show begins. Maybe they tried and it failed or they tried and it worked and now they’re engaged just kidding. Let’s make our own Hollywood here.
  • Give people details on how to get on-board; Maybe the reason you don’t have slightly older people getting on Tujuane is because you wouldn’t find them randomly loitering on the streets. Perhaps, you could have an avenue/channel through which they could apply and make it public so you can have a variety of applicants for you to choose from. Then you can visit them and do your thing after.

Besides that, I see the Kenyan local content is starting to get into making reality shows, that’s a great start. All the best to those looking for love, you shall find it or it shall find you, just a little patience.

Also, support local content, don’t shy off or think it’s shady, these guys are really trying. We should support our own, we’re one ain’t it? If anything, we should fight for more local content to be aired in place of those Mexican programs in the evenings (they have the same annoying story line, real as it is). What about the Kenyan Story? When it’s told, who will share it with the rest of the world? Because if we don’t, no one else will. It’s sad to see hawkers hawk away Kenyan movies or series in the streets for Ksh 100, while we watch some low-budget Nigerian movies on our own local TV, that’s pretty much having double standards. They should give Kenyan content airtime and priority.

We’re the revolution. Be the change that you want to see around you. Since you can’t change others, the least you can do, is change yourself.

Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*