Archive | March 2014

Do You Know What Happiness Is For You?

It’s been all things Foundation all day, everyday. For that reason, I hope that you’re coming for the walk this weekend 22nd March at Ngong Road Forest Sanctuary from 8:00am.  It’s going to be some good fun, we can really hold it down. Come for it, then let me know if you had a good time. If you don’t have fun, you’re probably boring *joke*. On a serious note though, the one reason I love this #SaveAMum initiative is because I can’t imagine a life without my Mum. I really can’t. She’s molded me. My baby sister and I are mini-her’s.

Foundation - Blog

I remember when I was growing up, we had our differences. She would deny me permission to go certain places and totally side with my dad on the NO’s. Although she did try to cover me up a couple of times when I fell off the wagon. Or make a big deal if I didn’t clean up my room or help the house-help clean up, to the point of waking us up after going to bed *or pretend to*. She was the morning alarm “Calls out Kawi. Once, twice … Footsteps! That was it,  I would be up before she twists open my door knob because, war!”. She would ask me about school, my dad was worse though, because I had to justify that I was reading and not just busy socializing with friends.

After those wars, she was my bestie. She’s the one I’d run to if I had problems in school, if I had an ache or itch (anywhere…lol), if I just wanted someone to rant to about anything and everything. She would always give me a listening ear. She knows all my friends even without ever meeting some because of all my stories. Through it all, she remains our root. She taught me and influenced the values I hold today. Of course I attribute it to my dad too, but her presence made it easier for him (especially that we’re 2 girls). I would like to #SaveAMum today so that another child can experience this kind of relationship, it’s heavenly.

#SaveAMum, Chase Group Foundation, World Happiness Day

Apparently, today is World Happiness Day. Who knew there was that one day we devote to happiness? These “World Days” never cease to amaze. Well, I’m not the happiest in the brood, but at least I don’t have a reason why I should not have a smile randomly plastered on my face, I’m blessed. No one has clearly pointed out what happiness is yet. Is it a state? Is it a moment? It’s got to be something. When you Google it now, guess the 1st thing that comes up? Yes, Pharrell William’s – Happy. His video shows a picture of happy, I would also be happy if I was in it.

Even if we don’t collectively have an answer, at least we can think of what we feel when we think we’re experiencing happiness. Some of the things that make me get that feeling I would say is “my happy” are:

Writing a blog post

Inviting family and  friends over to hang out or vice-versa

Love, light and peace around me

Accomplishing a goal

Eating delicious food

Good “Upbeat” Music

Beautiful Scenery  (give me a house at a beach front, I’ll be happy forever, promise!)

Lot’s of color on objects

Chatting about everything under the sun

Sharing a good laugh

Catching up with old friends and meeting new friends

Comfort in my space

Problem solving

Selfies

Nothing complicated really even the beach front. As long as these things happen, whenever and wherever they happen, I feel that dash of niceness. However, I think happiness is more internal than it is external and it’s experienced best when it’s felt and shared with others. Happiness can be anything you want it to be, as long as it brightens your soul and it helps you brighten another persons soul.

Signing Off ~ *Kawi*

Go For It. Even When It Seems Impossible.

“Sometimes we forget where we forget where we’ve come from, until someone reminds us”.

Ever been in a situation where someone tells you “if someone had told me this when I was your age, things would have been different?” My folks told me that a lot and for that reason, I always remember. It’s a pity statement, but it has so much impact. It says you have potential that no-one bothered to tap. Sometimes we need that drive, you know someone to tell you, “Go for it” or “You can do it”, simply because you can. It’s so easy to lose hope in yourself and in things around you when you’re faced by an obstacle.

The folks, they didn’t have it easy in their time and they made that very clear. There was no one to give them tips on how they should go about handling the different situations that faced them. Be it school, profession, dating, marriage, parenting … you name it. They always told me that they followed their instincts on whatever felt right and if it turned out wrong, you just work your way through it, alone. There was no one to tell them how to do what they did, there were barely any mentors or even people to motivate them, like we do now.

Tweet, Empower, Youth, Mentorship

The thing that amazes me most about them is that they never forget where they came from. They look back and see what they lacked and they want to make it different for the next generation. They tell us the stories, but they don’t dwell on them. They tell us so that we can be better than they were and do better than they did. They tell us that we have greater opportunities than they did and that we’re better off because we have them to guide us. Your folks have so much knowledge it’s ridiculous. If you say you don’t have a mentor, turn to your folks, your uncles, your aunties, your older friends. They might not be billionaires but they have a wealth of experience and knowledge that can help you become that billionaire that they didn’t become.

Why do you think they ensure that you go to good schools, that they check your report forms and performance in school and bash you when you’re not doing so well? That they want you to figure out what you want to be when you grow up early enough so that you can work towards it? Now it hits me that the question “what do you want to be when you grow up?” was not asked in vain. It comes in handy when we’re chasing our dreams. Dreams are built from a tender age. You might not be what you said you want to be, but at least it helped give you direction. I wanted to be a chef, then a doctor, look at me now, I’m a content girl.

Does that mean I haven’t gotten to where I wanted to be, I don’t think so. I cook some delish food and I’m still learning. I make home remedies and take care of anyone who’s unwell in my presence. But the fact that I had something I wanted to be, had me working hard even if not to be that, at least in the end of it, I found out what I was passionate about. My folks, they didn’t drill me into it. They guided me, and allowed me to be. But with guidance and constant check up’s on how I’m fairing in whatever I delve into. And for that, I really appreciate.

What made me actually think of this, is my baby sister and the tweet up there. She called and told me how school is just tough and draining, the exams, and how she’s scared of ever failing or not getting a first class honors because that would be letting down the folks. This made my heart sink a bit, because I was once in her shoes, same size, color, texture. Exactly the same.

School was tough. Heck, from primary school, secondary school, undergraduate, postgraduate and certifications. They were all so tough. I’m a last minute person (very bad trait) and I work best under pressure, so sometimes I would end up trans-nighting for exams, because failing wasn’t an option. Oh, I burnt that mid-night oil. School is just school, it never gets easy and you never get used to it. Life, life is also tough, the challenges are in excess. Sometimes I look back and the fact that I got through a certain stage, just makes me smile. Because I realize I’m actually stronger than I think I am and most times, more intelligent than I think I am.

School can make you under-rate yourself, life can make you under-value yourself. But if you encounter and engage the right people, people that empower you, they change how you perceive yourself and you become an over-achiever.

When you feel it’s so tough, because it was tough, school is not the end of the world. Many times, I did an exam that was so hard and I saw stars, but when the results came, I hadn’t done that bad, that made me feel better. Pressure is good, really good, because it give you a push, but don’t succumb to it. Don’t let pressure get to you, you get to it. This also reminds me of a time I was clueless in my programming classes, I just didn’t know how to code. But somehow I cracked it, but I was feeling like I just can’t do this anymore.

The folks, the ones who bash you when you feel like school is just crap, they were there, they just sat beside me as I did my project, asked what the system does because that’s all they could do to encourage me. That alone, gave me psyche to learn, to ask my friends for help, to do better. Let me not blow my trumpets but it went uphill. When work sucked and I just felt like I’ve had enough, the folks talked to me and told me of their experiences and that of their friends, and boy! Did I feel much better? People have gone through worse. Your case is just representative of a fraction. And they, those people they tell you about, those people that went rock-bottom, plus themselves too, they pulled through. You will pull through too.

So today, I just want to tell you, “Go for It, Even When It Seems Impossible. Simply because you can.

Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*

 

Week Starter…

We all go through stuff. Yes, we all have issues, doesn’t matter the magnitude they come in, could be the smallest or the biggest but an issue is still an issue. Some similar to other people’s, some that make you feel God just picked you out of everyone else and decided it’s you against the world, some that you would rather just keep to yourself, others that make you want to just retreat and say ‘enough is enough’. What rules despite these issues, is that you’re still alive.

They haven’t killed you. Unless you let them, because you could be alive on the outside but dead in the inside. So just brave them and let them know who’s in control. You always are. That’s what gives you the upper hand. Just that sometimes, you let go of that control role and leave it to the issues and they eat you up. That’s what issues are supposed to do, so they’re doing their job right. How about you? Are you doing yours right? Because you’re supposed to make sure that you manage and control those issues. At the end of the day, you’re supposed to starve them, be strong even when they weigh you down, smile even when they cramp your happiness, raise up and dust yourself even when you feel like you can’t do this any more. You can!

Hence, the phrase ‘what doesn’t kill you, only makes you stronger’. As long as your issue hasn’t killed you or you haven’t let it, it’s your way.  The experience is to make you stronger and smarter, so that you hopefully don’t find yourself in the same pit again or if you do, you know how to best handle it.

WATCHING

I have watched a couple of flicks but the one that totally made my day was, Being Mary Jane (Series). What you see, is what really happens. How they play out Mary Jane life, quite the typical girls struggles. It’s a tough world guys, we girls think men have it easier. Maybe not, but to get everything working out for you, you go through stuff and this one captures most.

READING

Chimamanda Ngozi”s – Americanah. Finally and I can’t get over her writing style. I love how descriptive she gets; you feel the presence of the cast, like you’re a fly on the wall. In my book, that’s an absolutely good writing skill.

EATING

I’m in food heaven, and I can never ever complain. We try to make delicious food. Good food can make a lousy day better.

Food, Cooking

LOOKING FORWARD TO

The Chase Group Foundation Charity Walk and Fun Day happening on 22nd March 2014 at Ngong Forest Sanctuary from 8am. The main aim of the walk is to raise funds to train a midwife and in turn #SaveAMum to reduce maternal mortality. Most mothers in Africa don’t have access to medical facilities during child-birth and as a result, maternal mortality is at an all time high.

Chase Group Foundation, #SaveAMum

Participate by simply registering for the Charity Walk and Fun Day. With KES 1,000, you get a T-shirt which serves as your entry ticket. You can also browse through other merchandise that would be of interest to you, buy and help #SaveAMum. Hope to see you there.

SAVING FOR

This couch I really, really, like really want. I know you’re thinking “girls!” but really, it’s so cosy and , I will get it. I’ll share the pics when I do, I’m that optimistic.

WEEK STARTER…

Even when you feel like you deserve it, don’t forget to say thank you, from the bottom of your heart.

Because, you barely do anything alone, it might seem so, but you don’t. For you to be where you are and have what you have, someone somewhere played a role. It could be that, someone checked up on you, someone encouraged you, someone went out of their way to help you, someone gave you an idea, someone gave you an opportunity, someone made you so friggin’ mad, it made you make a move in your life or someone was just there, looking up to you and they gave you the confidence to pursue whatever it is. There are many unseen actions that need to be thanked.

So, thank somebody today.

Have an amazing week now, won’t you?

Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*

And You let Her Go

You know that grown up feeling that overcomes you for a moment. It’s like an epiphany of sorts and you see something in different light. Something that one point you actually believed that that’s how it should be done. However, given the chance to re-think again today, you’d be like “No, how now?”. Some thoughts or opinions you had before, if revisited can give you a mini heart-attack. I don’t think it’s growing up that caused the change of heart as I’d said at the beginning, but exposure and experience. And that could be why those two are important even as you seek for jobs. Experience and exposure help influence your opinion on certain things, and that’s why…

…opinions are only valid for the duration they’re shared. They could change as soon as you put the full stop.

Anyhow, this epiphany happened as I listened to a current song that I rather like; Passenger – Let her go. Sometimes I listen to songs because of the beats, but when I see myself slowly getting the lyrics in (because I can listen to a song a million times but the lyrics don’t get in, it’s a rare disease called #ijustcantcramlyrics lol), I start to think about what it the artist is trying to bring out. Yeah, I can sing along but maybe I’m chanting illuminati, just kidding, but you know what I mean.

So as I listened on and sang along, I thought “wait a minute, what’s this guys saying?”. Makes sense from the quote “when you love something, let it go, if it was meant to be, it’ll come back, if it doesn’t, it never loved you…” Now, that doesn’t make sense to me anymore, so let me tell you a little something about love, my kind of love. Not necessarily the lover kind of love, just general love. For your family, friends and things.

Clara

You know it when you get it, and you don’t have to let go to know that you have it. Love doesn’t need proof by leaving and seeing whether they’ll (or it’ll) come back. Love just needs a few actions that express what you feel and what the other persons feels for you. Love doesn’t have seasons. Love is not like weather, it’s a constant through out the seasons. Love makes those seasons bearable. What happens within the seasons are feelings. Feelings, which are always bound to change depending on the situation you’re met with. If it’s rainy and it’s muddy and wet, you’ll hate it and wish for the sun, then when the sun is too scotchy, you’ll wish for the cold.

Love like other things in life, have rules, mostly unwritten. A few written. If you read the bible, it makes it easier for you to break the code. That’s why you’d find friends becoming (fri)enemies because of overstepping a love rule. If you disrespect me, then how do we get along? If you don’t forgive me for my shortcomings, then how do you expect this relationship to work out? If you keep my record of wrongs and keep reiterating them, that’s really annoying, just let go and move on, if you’re jealous of my achievement then how do we help each other? If you’re impatient with me, then how do we grow and be there for each other through the highs and lows?

That’s love. Don’t let her go when you love her, keep her instead. Love is about forgiveness, working it out, growing, letting go of baggage and moving on and while at it, the one thing that should stay, is that thing or that person(s) you love. Stupid, would be listening to the quotes and lyrics and letting go to see if the said person or thing will come back, even butterflies don’t. They fly away and find other places where they’ll fit in.

Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*