A Rainbow State of Mind

I saw the rainbow and it got me really excited. I always miss out on this opportunity. It reminded me of the rainbow story. You know the one with the golden pot at the end of the rainbow. I believe it, don’t judge now. We just need to figure where the end is, because I need to be there. It’s the colors that get me, the yellow & orange and how they stand out but still blend in with the rest. I don’t know how God did it, but he sure did it good. Of nature and its coolness. Just when I was about to appreciate it of course through a photo (which I would have posted on Instagram), I couldn’t get a clear shot. Then it slowly faded away and bam! No more rainbow. My life went back to normal. Not that normal is not exciting (maybe not so, just a wee bit), but there was that “return to normal state” feeling.

The state of the mind, very powerful. How one moment you can be excited because of the pomp and color in your life and the next minute you’re torn down because of the gloom & dullness in your life. It’s a rat-trap. The only thing that remains constant is you, your mind will always play tricks. Like the weather, one time it’s warm and sunny, then all over sudden it’s cold and rainy. Amidst all that confusion, the rainbow smiles at you with so much color it makes you indifferent to what’s actually happening. For a moment, you forget whether it was sunny or rainy, because the rainbow distracts you. That could be the trick.

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Know when to let out your rainbow, when you’re caught in between the two worlds. I know we’re human and it’s almost impossible to control your state of mind, but if the weather can do it, sure we can too. Your rainbow would be that thing that makes your insides smile even when your outside isn’t cooperating. Find it.

Happy Friday Lovelies. Lots of rainbows your way today and always!

Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*

You’ve Got To Start Somewhere

The other day I bumped into one of my childhood friends and as we were catching up, we start talking about how it is living on our own. I’m slightly older than she is so I’d been out in the woods a little longer. This got me thinking of my journey, because I just didn’t wake up one day and find myself where I am today, I ain’t no rocket.

I started somewhere. That somewhere sure wasn’t the top either. You know how we sing along to that “started from the bottom, now we’re here” song in the club, it pretty much comes to perspective. I haven’t reached there yet, but at least I believe I’m on the right tangent that’ll eventually lead me there, my own house.

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Back to where I started, she asked me about my 1st house. First, my 1st house was like a miracle, because I looked for it out of desperation. I wasn’t being chased out of home per se, but my parents were moving to a place that was going to be a little too far from my work place. Plus, I was going back to school, so the commute would have taken a toll on me. Basically, the only other solution was to get a place and move out. I honestly never imagined that moving out would require such little convincing, I thought my dad would flatly refuse. I searched around and through my mums network I was directed to an SQ at Ngumo. I liked the house despite it having its shortfalls – water issues, the bathroom was outside (gave me the creeps a couple of times), zero natural light into the house, overnight rent inflation, non-refunded deposit and so on.

How I furnished the house, I recall, I didn’t get everything at once, but I had saved enough to pay my deposit, rent and shop for necessary items. I also had my little monthly income (weh, that was an experience on learning how to manage the little you have…lol). I worked with a list that indicated things in order of priority. For instance, I sat on cushions and watched movies on my laptop the 1st few months (so a couch and TV were bottom on the list). I got some “hand me downs” from my mum, while my dad played a huge role in sponsoring and ensuring that I acquired the things that were flagged *important* especially those pertaining to food – his biggest worry was that I should be able to cook and store my food when it remains, so for him a cooker and fridge were top priority (it’s funny when I think of it now).

All the same, I loved my little first house, I made it habitable. Time came for me to move out of there after a year and some months when my landlord experienced some issue with the main landlord (rental house issues). It was unexpected, and looking for a house is no easy feat. I prayed about it and voila, asking around, my friend linked me up with an agent in Kilimani who showed me a house that I fell in love with at first sight. It solved all the problems I had with my first SQ. This one was an extension with water than never run out; normal internal bathrooms; signed agreement – no rent inflation and deposit is refunded minus maintenance; excess light, with a sun roof in my bedroom, it’s like the landlord was going green; much bigger, everything fit perfectly.

Somewhere along the way, in as much as I loved my little light haven, I felt like I was growing out of it. Like I would like to move in to a bigger space, that’s not within someone’s compound, an apartment. I respected my feeling and urge to look for another house. After a few searches here and consultations there, a prayer and some more, I found the house I now live in. It’s just what I wanted. Now the next feeling, I sense it from afar, is to own a house.

Just like I found my way around different houses that meet my growing needs, or just like I progressed from one stage to another and learnt along the way, that’s how life is in general. My inner being nudges me to grow in the different spheres of my life and pushes me to seek for more even when it almost seems impossible. I believe that’s how you #ChaseYourDreams. With dreams, they don’t come easy, you’ve got to start somewhere.

Happy Hump Day!

Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*

The Concealer or Open Book?

You’re given a choice between the two, which one would you pick based on the one that best fits your personality?

You wonder what I would pick? Let me first put them into perspective. The concealer is used to hide a blemish, a scar mostly on the face or a part that’s visible to the public. We’re not talking make up, but that would be the best example to use. The concealer would be one that matches your skin tone so that it’s not so obvious that you’ve concealed or hidden anything. It makes you look flawless, it brings you close to perfection with the even skin tone (which many of us lack). The concealer guides you on what you’ll think about them and how you’ll perceive them. You see, they’ve already concealed their flaws, and to the public the only thing that’s left to think is how perfect they are.

While the open book, is just like it is, open and ready for you to read and interpret the way your mind knows best. The open book is at the recipients discretion, how he/she interprets it is up to them. The open book has your wrongs and rights, your strengths and weakness all laid out. Your story exposes your flaws and perfections at one go. It’s like having a face with uneven skin tone, but you just rock it because, that’s you. Whether you have a concealer or not, it doesn’t bother you because, those are the things that make up the person you are. And there’s an inherent reason why you are the way you are.

That being said, for the longest time I thought I was an open book. But with time I realized, I can be a concealer too, trouble. Though, I try to wipe off the concealer as soon as I realize it’s covering me up and trying to make me portray something I’m not. At the end of the day, I want anyone that reads my *open* book to know who I am and who I’m not, what I advocate for and what I don’t, in as much as there as there is also room for improvement since I don’t have it all figured out. It makes it easier for you to sort out your life and know who fits in and who doesn’t. It’s a tough and crazy world, just as there are so many things craving your attention, which one’s will get it at any one point largely depends on what you portray yourself to be.

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So, I would pick the open book and really work towards ensuring that I remain as one. Even when sometimes my other inner voice tells me that I need the concealer.

Have a soulful Sunday, and lots of blessings your way.

Signing off ~~~ *Kawi*

Of Treasures and Girlfriends

It’s been crazy but beautiful. I’ve been working, working really hard, like the good girl I am *toot toot*. So you can imagine when I want to write a captivating post and well, the only thing going on is work and the personal life I pick up over the weekends. I have come to that point where I look forward to the weekend like never before. It feels very well deserved with just 2 days to live it out. There should have been a day slotted between Saturday and Sunday, someone slacked on the day naming job.

However, I’d like to tell you about a treasure I found. Late last year when I did my big chop (aka BC, I’ve become one of them already), my excited friends led me into a series of groups that would induct me through my natural phase, lest I relapse. Kidding, but I guess they knew how natural kinky hair needs a lot of TLC as well as a couple of girlies that have your back when the mane gets tough.

That’s how I found this group of beautiful online girlfriends called “Kurlly Diaries”. You know how you end up loving people you’ve never met, because somehow even as you communicate virtually, there’s some realness that manifests itself. And it’s through that realness, that they’ve managed to play an important role in my life. Such that even when the notifications are in excess, I open them gladly in my free who lied and told us there’s free time? time, just to see what someone has to say. I learn a lot of girl stuff from them – especially when it comes to managing my small mane – hair and body products, and referrals on where to get legit and affordable stuff.

They come up with challenges that sometimes I’m too lazy to take up but one thing I admire about them is the effort they (some ladies) put in their day-to-day operations to better their life and that of their loved ones. It pushes me to stop being lazy and get going too. From health & beauty regimens, fashion, DIY’s, food, to financial & time management. They share information, help each other out & let you be. They think of fun ways to make these difficult tasks manageable. They encourage each other with every step made to achieve the task or challenge presented and at the end sometimes even give small rewards to the most engaging person.

The one that recently caught my attention was “emptying your stash”. The idea is to take a picture of the stash you have (whether full or half way done) and then aim to first finish them before purchasing others. I’m the kind of person that can purchase a product just because … someone told me it works great, serves a purpose I intend to achieve even though not necessary/urgent or it looks good, it’s affordable and I can own it.

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With this challenge, I now feel the need to question the necessity and relevance of things before I purchase them. To the extent that I have the good against evil conversations with myself at the store, and talk myself out of an unnecessary purchase. To make sure I make use of what I have first before greed gets the better part of me.

“If I don’t need it, then I don’t buy it. If there’s something else that serves the same purpose, does it well & I still have it stashed, then I don’t buy it.”

It’s now as simple as that. That so far has helped me become more conscious during my purchases, which will in turn help me save a shilling or more in the long run.

On the same note, just after claiming how clueless I am about weddings, which I really am for real, not kidding, I got some girlfriend offers from Flo Ngigi (she could possibly be my twin), Wangu Yann (mentor in my teen years, now big sister), Njeri Olang (new God-sent friend) and Elizabeth Njeri (my best of friends, she must’ve been a wedding planner in her other life, she reminds me of 27dresses) – telling me they want to be there for me. I shall use up that offer, so don’t withdraw it, but the thought, just that feeling of wanting to be there for me, that counts. Thank you from the bottom of my heart, you’re my treasures.

Signing off ~~~ *Kawi*

Where Did You First Meet?

Have you watched the video by Train – Marry Me? The 1st time I watched it, it made me look back at how I would tell our story. And boy, don’t we all have different stories to tell? They make beautiful memories.

It’s one of those questions you can only escape for so long. Your friends always want to know the story. Even when you feel it sounds boring and you’re tempted to spice it up a little more. There are people with really interesting stories though, truth be told. Some met in a bus or a flight or on transit; others were high-school or campus sweethearts or neighbors or church-mates, while others in random places like supermarkets, barbecues or Facebook (and other social media channels – Instagram, Twitter … name it). Most of these are usually by chance, the world does the magic for you and your lucky stars are aligned for your paths to meet (or cupid for those of you who believe there’s a chubby kid shooting love arrows around). There’s some awww’ness in the versatility of these stories, from the simplest to the complex ones.

I think with our busy schedules these days, it’s possible to miss these chances that used to be our rather obvious ways to meet. I don’t know if it’s because work is more than it used to be or it’s because that’s the kind of life we’ve chosen. But, for some reason most people are too preoccupied to open their eyes and look out for those kind of connections. It doesn’t stop there, someone out there noticed this gap and developed a platform for you. Innovation I tell you. An online dating platform, yes, you heard that right. I know what you’re thinking, I thought that too.

Dating, Relationships, Online Dating

I have always thought online dating sites to be dodgy or for lack of a better word just creepy. We all have that ↑  negative perception about meeting someone online. Plus after watching “Dates from Hell”, you forever have second and third thoughts about ever being on a blind date. Anyhow, back to our dating site, it’s a Kenyan one by the way and the 1st of its kind. Ian Isherwood (Kenyan, born & raised in Mombasa), the founder of the DateMe Kenya, says this idea came about when his friends complained about how hard it is to meet like-minded people in Nairobi when you’re juggling professional responsibilities. He’s seen it work in the Western countries (America and Europe), so why not in Kenya? The site aims to provide an exclusive, hustle-free platform for busy professionals to meet compatible partners and experience quality online dating in a safe, secure and private online environment.

Personally, I still have my reservations. Let’s blame the movies. If I was not taken, my timid self would still stick to the traditional way. I must have either known you or met you somewhere (either by my own means or through friends) but a blind meet, nah nah!

What’s your take on this kind of platform? Do you think it’ll fly in Kenya? Would you be open to meet or search for “your person” online? If someone told you they met their spouse online, what would you think? Do tell.

Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*

Co-ed Baby Showers

It’s amazing when I’m invited for a baby shower, it shows my friends are doing things right no pun. It’s been known that baby showers are a thing for the women folk but I’m starting to think otherwise the more I go for them. I think that both the women and men should be involved in it, because both parties are just as affected by this tremendous transition.

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For baby showers, the girlie’s organize a surprise shower for the almost popping mommy-to-be. They buy gifts and meet up at someone’s house or agreed relaxed place. There are lots giggles and excitement, frills, drinks and just good vibes. The girlie’s give the mommy-to-be tips on how to be a good mommy as well as the horrific and beautiful stories that come with motherhood. It’s actually a lot of fun. For the mommy-to-be, by the end of the shower and presentation of the gifts (and explain why they chose to buy that gift and its purpose). At the end of it, there’s a load off her back in terms of what to expect when the D-day reaches. At least the girls have given her a sneak-peak of what she’s bound to experience based on personal and over-heard experiences.

Well, as I sat there chatting with my buddies, I thought, “what about the men?” Who gives them tips on how to be a good dad? Fatherhood is a challenge too, just as motherhood is. The changes that come with it are a force to reckon with – and sometimes it catches them unawares. The only difference is that they are not carrying the child, but mentally, they are. Aren’t they the ones who have to deal with the demands of the almost popping mommy-to-be? This got me thinking of co-ed baby showers.

When my time comes, I’d like to have a co-ed (Oh,I mean, combined – that’s how they say it) baby shower. Where both our female and male friends are present, those who’ve experienced motherhood and fatherhood and can tell a tale or two as well as offer some advice that could be of great help.

I feel that it’s about time we shifted focus from just the mommy-to-be and accommodated the expecting dad as well. I mean we want our kids to have good fathers, so why not include them on the shower treat as well. Especially now that men are taking a keen interest in their wife’s pregnancy and giving her support at every stage of pregnancy, it is only fair to include them in the shower-treat.  What do you think?

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Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*

The Million Dollar Question?

Even after I said “YES”, the first question that ran through my mind was, “how did you know the size of my finger?” I was too curious, because that would have been my only selling point.

The story, now that’s the question everyone has been asking of late. I’m not the best at narrating the same story over and over. But it seems for this season that I’m in, I need to get used to it and, that this bling sure does bring a lot of attention. I didn’t see myself in this phase this soon, and maybe that’s why the mister managed to sneak away with it. I was being very futuristic, I didn’t want to give him pressure in as much as all of you out there gave me pressure *looks at you, you and you*. I just wanted to go with the flow.

And with the flow I went. He’s a sneaky one, because on that Saturday 19th April, it was my turn on the rotter to work. He diligently dropped me at work, no signs whatsoever except him booking me for the day and night. All through work, I felt like I was in a daze, which made me think with the weather change I could be in the process of catching a cold. However, I wrote a post too, it was too pressing, I had learnt a couple of things that week through him and with him. Time to go home, I call him just to give him a heads up, and he offers to come back and pick me up. He’d done this a couple of times before so again, it felt normal.

When he picks me up, he hands me a gift bag and inside is perfume. WOW! He had chosen a yummy scent that I immediately adopted as My Scent. I was still in a daze. Let me explain the state, “happy and floaty for no reason, so it just feels a little awkward”. Does that make some sense?

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So we go grab something to bite and go home to watch some flicks looking forward to dinner. This Easter was pretty chilled out with no out-of-town plans (contrary to what we had earlier planned). So I was looking forward to the food, he was clearly looking forward to other grander things. If only I knew. I would have bought a new dress…lol. When evening reaches, he nudges me and tells me to dress-up. With his special line “we can’t be late for this one.” You know we women and our delaying tactics, I got it from my mum.  I was on time this time round, funny enough I didn’t even  give him a hard time getting dressed up. Normally I’d be in jeans but that day, I was very willing to dress up.

Out we went, where? “It’s a surprise,” he says. We check in to Serena and I’m like aha, but the “Captains Table at The Mandhari Restaurant” AHA! I only see all that attention in movies. And the attention is from when you check in to when you’re leaving the building. God bless those lovely waiters.  With a whole bottle of Moet to ourselves, if I knew what was going on, I’d have had a photographer on speed-dial. We just had make do with what we had by ourselves and the new fad – selfies to make memories. I loved the privacy, he knows me too well.

KawiSnippets, Engaged

1. I, very clueless  2. The Mandhari Restaurant Menu 3. Moet, 4. So sparkly, champagne ain’t the yummiest beverage at first but the taste grows on you. 5. The Master of selfies, takes us one. 6. Healthy starter – with wheat, nuts and all things healthy. 7. Mushroom Soup 8. Chicken Soup, 9. with a Quail egg to compliment (even with all the hype, I’d never eaten one yet, there’s a 1st for everything) – It had a name, I can’t remember. 10. Chefs special – Shrimp (with things in it) – I could have eaten more of those, too yummy for just one. 11. Creamy Au Gratin Potatoes – Pure yumminess in a cup plate. I’m now a potato person – being the person who hated potatoes in her food, but with cheese & butter anything is possible. 12. Pork Ribs. 13. Lamb Chops. 14, 15, 16. Those are two happy & grateful people.

It looks like my main word is yummy. It’s either yummy or not yummy. In a nut shell that’s how the evening went down of course followed with a nigh-out with a couple we look up to (not the parents haha, Mr & Mrs Ngigi). I was overwhelmed with joy. Too overwhelmed that we forgot to take pics of the dessert which the waiter said “comes served very hot.” Eh it was hot when she flung open the lid and I saw petals, a box ring and my boyfriend down on one knee.

No, I didn’t cry, not just yet. I think I was too surprised that he decided that it’s about time he “put a ring on my fatty-fatty finger”. I had asked God to give me someone I’ll be ready to spend the rest of my interesting life with. And with him, I felt that this was it. We have been together through the murks and the light as well, we’re growing together, we try up lift each other when either of us is down, we share the same values, beliefs and principles, he loves me all the time, even when I get to his nerves – like when I give completely wrong directions. He’s my all-weather friend. What more could I ask for? I am thankful to God that he’s taken his time to bring closer to me my life partner and we’re on the same page.

Engagement

For the next chapter, there’s no pressure. We’ll arrange it how we know it best, with the help of those who want the best for us. In all honesty, I’m the most clueless of bride-to-be, but we’ll sail through with God’s blessings. Can’t wait for that day and the lifetime to follow though.

To him,

Have a lovely week, now won’t you? To a wonderful journey we’ll have on here. Lot’s of love, light & peace from us to you.

Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*