Tag Archive | Women

Always #LikeAGirl

*Disclaimer: Just felt like writing something based on the campaign, but I’m not in any way associated with or endorsing Always.

I work with music and sometimes with imaginary music. When I have my headphones on and nothing is actually playing, but for some reason it feels like the music is on – and then I get into my zone. Does that ever happen to you? Anyway, as I was doing my internet rounds some time, I happened to come across this lovely ad. Confession, I love Safaricom and Samsung ads, the rest, I just “Skip Ad”. That aside, have you watched the Always #LikeAGirl ad, no? You can watch it here.

It took me down memory lane. I remember when I wrote this “Yes, I’m a Girl” post. We girls are really sensitive, I know dudes are too (I’m just massaging your ego by the way), but we’re a special breed and by all means, in a good way. That’s why people would tell you you’re doing something “like a girl”. I don’t think it’s an insult per se, that’s what most people perceive it to be. But I don’t think when someone says it that’s what they intend to mean. It’s just that we girls, do things delicately and with such grace. It’s in our nature to be gentle that sometimes it tends to look like you’re weak. Then if you did things in a manly way and had manly features to top that – you’d be classified as a tomboy – which isn’t a good thing either.

I grew up in the 90’s. And because technology had not been fully discovered – the best we had then was Nintendo, Joy Game for the rich kids and brick games, Ending Man (a cheaper version of the Nintendo that used cartridges – 90 in 1 games, my favorite being Duck Hunt, Super Mario etc.) for the rest of us, but that was late in the 90’s. Before that, we were big on outdoor games. You know the kind that got you dirty from head to toe – the hop scotch, kati, shake, rounder’s (the own African version of baseball), bladder, scramboo (with our little BMX bikes, we could do wonders when it came to making 3600 turns). By the time you’re being called back to the house in the evening, the 1st task was to jump into the shower. I can bet all kids had that same routine, because there’s no way you were sitting on the couch with those clothes or that body.

Nintendo, Always, #LikeAGirl, Back in th Day

When we used do this outdoor games, most of them required you to display your masculine side, because they were quite aggressive and tactical. And if you throw a ball in a light or curvy manner, you’d be told, “stop throwing like a girl” or if you got hurt and you started crying, someone will do “stop crying like a girl”. If you happened to be identified as the weaker link by the other kids, you’d be placed as the “helper”. The helper was the useless person in the games – the one who’s given zero roles or attention in the course of the game because you’re team-less and you had no impact on the outcome of the game. It happened to you when the kids were selecting teams and no one wanted you on their teams because you’d make them lose. For some reason, it was always a girl or a boy who’s like a girl … been there, you feel “if only the world could open up and swallow me up” or “if only I could be invisible for a moment”.

Always be the first one to believe in yourself, even before anyone else does, because if you don’t, you might just end up disappointed or de-psyched. ~ Kawi

I know it’s tough believing in yourself – it is even for me most of the time, even when I know I’ve got it. But you don’t have much of a choice, not in this competitive world.

Now that I’m a grown up woman, I look back at my young and wild days, and I’m like, I’m glad I did everything I did #LikeAGirl. I wouldn’t do it any different given another chance because it is in my nature to do things as I do. For me to have gotten as far as I have based on what I do, I sure was doing something right, at least being a girl. So don’t let the experiences in your childhood or teenage hood define who you’ll be or what you’ll do. Just know that by being you, especially the best version of you, things will always turn out great.

Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*

Co-ed Baby Showers

It’s amazing when I’m invited for a baby shower, it shows my friends are doing things right no pun. It’s been known that baby showers are a thing for the women folk but I’m starting to think otherwise the more I go for them. I think that both the women and men should be involved in it, because both parties are just as affected by this tremendous transition.


For baby showers, the girlie’s organize a surprise shower for the almost popping mommy-to-be. They buy gifts and meet up at someone’s house or agreed relaxed place. There are lots giggles and excitement, frills, drinks and just good vibes. The girlie’s give the mommy-to-be tips on how to be a good mommy as well as the horrific and beautiful stories that come with motherhood. It’s actually a lot of fun. For the mommy-to-be, by the end of the shower and presentation of the gifts (and explain why they chose to buy that gift and its purpose). At the end of it, there’s a load off her back in terms of what to expect when the D-day reaches. At least the girls have given her a sneak-peak of what she’s bound to experience based on personal and over-heard experiences.

Well, as I sat there chatting with my buddies, I thought, “what about the men?” Who gives them tips on how to be a good dad? Fatherhood is a challenge too, just as motherhood is. The changes that come with it are a force to reckon with – and sometimes it catches them unawares. The only difference is that they are not carrying the child, but mentally, they are. Aren’t they the ones who have to deal with the demands of the almost popping mommy-to-be? This got me thinking of co-ed baby showers.

When my time comes, I’d like to have a co-ed (Oh,I mean, combined – that’s how they say it) baby shower. Where both our female and male friends are present, those who’ve experienced motherhood and fatherhood and can tell a tale or two as well as offer some advice that could be of great help.

I feel that it’s about time we shifted focus from just the mommy-to-be and accommodated the expecting dad as well. I mean we want our kids to have good fathers, so why not include them on the shower treat as well. Especially now that men are taking a keen interest in their wife’s pregnancy and giving her support at every stage of pregnancy, it is only fair to include them in the shower-treat.  What do you think?


Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*

Women Lie More and Better?

It’s definitely simpler to lie. It rolls easy on the tongue and gets you off situations fast enough but not long enough. We have our excuses why we do it, sometimes you do it to protect the people around us, to shelter them from any hurt that the truth may cause. Because, most times as it is or we assume it is, the truth hurts. We don’t realize that in the end, it really doesn’t, the truth actually saves you from getting hurt.

Ask anyone who’s been lied to and what they felt when they eventually found out they were being lied to. If you’re that person,what was your reaction? Mine’s always, I wish you had told me the truth.

It’s easier to deal with a truth than with a lie, because once you’re done and the person on the receiving end has reacted, that’s it for you. You’ll know whether it’s gotten you in trouble or everything’s peachy, the verdict happens there and then. On the other hand, when you lie, you’re always waiting for the truth to unfold and the outcome could be uglier. Most of us when in that situation (where you have to make the choice between the truth or a lie to cover it up), lying always seems to be the easier and better option.


What made me think of this, was a programme showing on local Tv. I was flipping channels to see what’s interesting, then bam! Women were there discussing how women lie more and better than men. That would certainly would catch my attention. I’m no feminist who are they by the way? but hey, why such a serious accusations to the women folk alone. It was Alfajiri on K24, the discussion went on on why women lie more than men. Whatever they were saying sounded valid because I’ve seen it, heard it and many at times experienced it. At least they didn’t exclude the fact that men lie too, but it was an all women discussion, so they couldn’t talk on their behalf. Jimmy Gathu, was the referral on things men that popped up.

Women would lie for many reasons they said, plus they do it better. For fear of being judged wrongly, being rejected for who they are, to protect the ones they love, because they need to (you know, circumstances). They went on and on, they’re valid reasons, but I think they were lame too. Because lies, they’re not an armor. They don’t shield those things from happening. What they do, is just push you more to the edge of the cliff without your knowledge. The next thing you know, you’re hanging by a thread. The lies that once a protection, don’t even offer a cushion for when you hit the hard ground.

It always starts as subtle lies. Like, about yourself, what you do, where you are, where you live, who you are or that you’ll do something while you know that you won’t or your circumstances don’t allow you to?

What if something happens and the people you’ve lied to find out that you don’t live there because it happened that they need to come visit you without your knowledge or they wanted to surprise you say on your birthday. What if someone you lied to meets your friend and as your name pops up, they ask about what you do & they have conflicting information, just that one knows the truth. Or you lie you’re somewhere you’re not, and someone is asking you because they saw you. Lies need a follow-up, so you have to remember what you lied and stick to it. Isn’t that more frustrating?

In my honest opinion, I’d rather say and hear the truth than a lie any day. Sometimes I have gold-fish memory, so I’d rather not keep a record of lies in my file system, that’s my main reason. I’m not perfect or a saint, I’m not saying I don’t lie to cover my ass, I do sometimes, but now that I think of it, the truth keeps your heart at peace. Plus there’s some matureness that comes with it. It shows that you can trust someone because they are true to you.

Truth is transparency, it doesn’t mean you divulge everything about you or your life, it means that the information you give at anytime is real, it’s you, it’s who you are. Not what you intend to be, or wish you could be or maybe you could put that as a disclaimer as you give the information, saves you a lot.

Truth is honesty, being honest with yourself and those around you. Truth is realistic,  being real not only with yourself but also with those around you.

It was April Fool’s day, hope you weren’t fooled. I wasn’t, for once. The one day you’re allowed to lie and prank people hope you took full advantage of it unlike me. Great week ahead!

Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*

Friday Selfies

Thank God It’s Friday and it’s International Women’s Day. Ata girl! It’s also the day the final results of elections are being released in Kenya *crossing fingers*. Would like to go back to the office next week knowing who’s going to be running our government for the next 5 years. Maybe they could cut down the taxes. Every time I look at my pay-slip and think the amount of tax I pay and what the rest of the country-people pay cumulated should make our country more comfortable than our homes man. It’s crazy, what do you think? I mean, things like transport should never stress us. It should be a swish. I hope the next government makes a difference in our lives. Mediocre is not an option no more.

Women! Women! Women! What would men do without the ‘wo’ in their lives? We are the different breed, the ones who are a bit difficult to figure. Yet we always want them to “go figure” us out, then surprise us with niceties. Considering they don’t have the advantage of books that tell them how to figure us women out. We have a million and one books telling us the same thing about men. They’re all different but there are those things that cut across all of them. Those things that we have to understand, then work around to make sure our men are happy.

The ‘wo’ is versatile, not accustomed to one thing. This time it’s like this next time it’s like that. It’s even difficult to understand ourselves sometimes, truth be told. There’s so much going on in our lives. If it’s not the drama (we not so surprisingly have drama whether we like it or not) that we get ourselves into, it’s the zit on the forehead or the bad hair day or hormones gone haywire, or we’re not feeling so beautiful or appealing, or the clothes despite looking stunning on the outside don’t make you feel outstanding in the insides. Such like things.

You see the number of things that happen in these small, medium and plus-size bodies you see strutting in the streets or in your homes. That’s a lot, but that’s part of who we are. We handle a lot. That’s what makes us interesting. If we went M.I.A life wouldn’t be as interesting I suppose. It’s all in our caring, motherly and loving nature that is I believe in every woman. It could be your mother, wife, girlfriend, sister, friend, and stranger.

In that case, be sure to tell the women in your life how beautiful they look, how loving they are and how blessed you are for having them in your life. That only, will make her reach the clouds and probably not get back…lol. You’ll have made a woman happy for a second there and if you’re lucky enough, a minute *just kidding*. We’re easy to please, ish!


Happy International Women’s Day to all my woman friends and relatives. To my mother, I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you, you more than rock. Friday selfies just for kicks. You know you’ve got to look for the fun in your face, if you can’t get it in your surroundings. That’s my excuse and I stick to it *wink*. You know women and the camera flash light, yeah, me too ha ha!

International Women's Day

Selfies: Take 1 *naaah* cut. cut. cut

Honestly, I was just sited on the couch watching TV and reading then the camera called me, “Kawi, how about a pic or a couple?” and then this happened. Otherwise, I hope your Friday is going on well? Here,  *sigh* the political atmosphere got me staying indoors and the way I wanted to go for a couple of rounds. Couch potato’ing can be quite the pass time. I think from today it’s life back to normal, this wait has been long overdue. Whatever comes off it, becomes!



Keep safe and as is protocol … live, love and laugh a little more than the usual this weekend and the coming week. God bless y’all mates!

Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*

Weird Girliness

Tis the end of the Octo month, but not the end of creating awareness on cancer and how it can be detected early. Let’s not take these things for granted, I know I also forget. Though, the more we talk about it, it acts as a reminder to many.

It’s Halloween too and am sure enough most of us me included don’t really know what it’s all about. Except the part where there are lots of pumpkins, costume parties, scary stories and the best of all, lots and lots of candy from trick-or-treating. All thanks to movies. That’s one of the main reasons I would love to be where they celebrate. I would probably just dress up like a kid and do kiddy things like go trick-or-treating. A few years ago one of my cousins visited us right after Halloween and she brought us a whole months supply of candy. Am talking mars, snickers, m&m’s, haribo’s and the likes…yumminess galore! (A shout out to Wanja, I still recall).

Halloween is not a culture that’s adopted here, in Kenya I mean. So I won’t even go into it. For us, it’s just another day to be on the grind and hustle. No parties, no candy but there’s always a constant supply of scary stories…lol.

Halloween, Monkey, October

Well, maybe I could take this opportunity to tell you 3 things that I think make me a weirdo girly girl. You know those things that would make you think you’re a girl so you should be into them like the way it’s supposed to be, but I am not.

1. Nail Polish

I have never understood girls obsession with nail polish, this includes my baby sister. I have never been into it, but I have tried to force the trend. I even go ahead and buy the polish that’s in it. Spend between KES 300 – 500 on some good polish and it goes stays on my dresser for a while, say until my sister comes over and does her nails.

I am patient, but I don’t extend my patience to waiting for the polish to dry.

I do lots of miscellaneous housework that involves touching water so I prefer plain trim nails. If the hairdresser insist, I do the colorless polish. I hate how polish looks good when you apply it then smudges, scratches or chips after a few hours or days. That means removing and reapplying … Ai! No need.

2. Make-Up

I just can’t. I have not really tried it on a regular day, say once I tried mascara, which was a massive fail because that means I couldn’t touch or “itch” my eyes. Another thing is, how I dress up in 15-30 mins or less depending on how much I snooze, make up would mean I have to wake up earlier or else it would be Halloween everyday…lol. Or maybe am not yet grown up enough, nothing to conceal, I don’t know. The only time I attempted make up was at my cousin’s wedding, which am sure I’d wiped off by the time the occasion began. Lip-gloss is enough make up for me.

3. Shopping

Yes, it’s retail therapy, ooh some gooood therapy so to say! However, I am more of an impulse buyer than a planned and organised shopper. Every time I plan to go shopping, unless I have involved a dedicated shopper in my plan, that plan goes undone. I do it out of dire need or desperation (I was avoiding that word), but really when I’m like, “I really need shoes or  a coat or …” then I have to go search. In which case, I don’t go looking around much, I probably have a place in mind. It’s like I have some sort of telepathy with whatever it is I want, I don’t have to search long and hard, I just come across it.

Some inspiration for the day. Ooh almost forgot to mention, I love color. At least that one cancels off some weirdo-ness no?

Girl, dreams, plans, ability, woman


Have a beautiful end of month. Take someone out for some shake and cake, scrape off that crave.

Signing Off ~~~ Kawi

Woman Of Substance

Don’t we all hate disappointments? That being the sole reason you would rarely find me asking for help. I’ll always try to be ninja or superwoman just to avoid disappointments. I am totally guilty of this, I can’t even start denying and as result I set low expectations on people.Which after some thought in as much as it seemed smart, I found it rather lame.

Why would I set low expectations just because I fear disappointments? That means then I get a raw deal from whoever it is and I’ll just be okay with it. It’s not what I deserve, but it’s what I have chosen to get and so I settle for it. It’s more like a trade-off,  to avoid getting disappointed, then set low expectations, a lie we feed ourselves every other day.  Low expectations are actually the reasons we get disappointed, why we get hurt, why we are not happy, why we don’t get what we deserve, why our worth is under estimated.

Set high expectations for yourself and for others because a woman of substance knows what their worth and what they deserve. A woman of substance is a woman who has strong character, is consistent, has more to her than meets the eye and has a variety of interests outside and within her home and family. She is interesting to get to know; she possesses a depth of personality and character.

That’s what you should strive to be, don’t let anyone or anything make you think any less of yourself. You’re the best there could ever be and there’s no one else who can match up to you. I mean, after all you are the only you around. You need to leave a mark that no one else can replace, we all have that ability in one way or another…no?

To all, the women, whoever you are and wherever you are, it is a huge blessing that you are there. You all make life beautiful for without you so many things wouldn’t be. And to say the least, as my friend has put it, all those little things women do that may seem fussy, they actually do make life much easier for you. Take some time to appreciate a woman or two who play a role in your life, not just today but every other day and you’ll see the difference that makes.

Well … well … well, now that most women are defined by their relationships I can bet I’m not wrong on this. Here goes to the song of the day, I love it!

Lot’s of love to the women in who make my life beautiful. God bless y’all with your heart’s desires!

Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*

What defines a woman?

With reference to this post:  Every Woman’s Desire : It’s an Excerpt from the book ”Captivating – Unveiling the mystery of a Womans Soul” by John and Stasi Eldredge which my mum had gotten for me as a birthday gift. Well, somethings like this come in handy in life because as it is, this books has helped understand some things about women. Yeah, we try to understands ourselves too.

Women, Relationships, Life

So here goes, “What defines a woman?” This is the most difficult topic. Even us women don’t really know. But anyway, according afore-mentioned book, “Most women define themselves in terms of their relationships, and the quality they deem those relationships to have.”

Correct me if I’m wrong, but honestly speaking. Just take a rough look at all the women in your life…this is for both men and women to  do. Ever since I read that book, I’ve always tried to prove this point wrong (the last 8 months). To say that they did their analysis wrong – that a woman cannot just be simply defined by her relationships, emotions and so on. How now? I also did not get it at that point.

Now, I totally understand. Have a look at these women:

A woman who is educated and so learned, they’ve done their degrees, masters and maybe even PH’d

A woman who is living on the fast lane – she’s probably a C.E.O or Manager of some big corporation

A woman who works to earn a living i.e it could be any level of work.

A stay at home woman, *desperate housewives kinda woman*

A woman who is still a student

A woman who is popular among peers, could classify her as a Celebrity

A woman who has aged and now is reliving her life with grandchildren

I was just trying to classify the different kind of women we would find in our society. I am   pretty sure we all have a female friend who falls under this categories or many others that I haven’t mentioned. Ever asked them “Hey, How are you doing?”

Women are not like men, when you ask a woman “Hey babe, how are you doing?” Her first, very first instinct or thought will be emotional  again correct me if im wrong. She will say how she is based on her emotions. Whether she is she happy, in love, sad or depressed. Unlike a Man, when you ask him, “Wassup dude, how are you doing?” His very first instinct is material. It’s in terms of his business or deals. Whether they’re doing well, he’s making money or he’s getting the publicity he needs.

This is quite interesting, when I actually realised it. Do you know a woman could have prospered in everything she is doing but if her relationships are a fail then everything she’s worked for really loses it’s mean. A woman’s pride is the success of  her relationships with the spouse, friends and children. That’s why women have so much drama, but for some reason, they eventually make up with the person they had issues with. And if the relationship is still sore, that will be the most depressing thing. It’s one of the reasons that would make a woman cry or feel that she’s not worth it.

It’s said that you can get a woman all the material things in the world, yes women like material things, dresses shoes, perfume, handbags, cars but show them no love then you have practically done nothing. They cancel out.


Why do you think a woman will work on their appearance for hours? Why a woman would stand by her loved ones no matter the circumstance *ride or die*? Why a woman would be easily conned by some ruthless con man using some emotional game? Why a woman would cry while watching a sad or mushy movie?

And the King of them is, “Why all the movies or programs that target women all have relationships/marriages in it?

Ever seen a group of women sitting together, when you come close, what is the main topic of discussion? Even when they are gossiping, what do they gossip about? It’s always on RELATIONSHIPS. It could be boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife, Mother/Child, Clande/Clandestine. Even when the agenda is business oriented, a women’s first thought is her relationship.

This is the one thing that makes men and women very different. Sometimes men would except the woman to be the pillar of strength, because truth be told, women are strong and can technically handle anything that comes their way – I’ve witnessed that, but they are much better and stronger when their relationships are on check.

There’s a quote I like to hate, it sounds a bit cold but it’s so true.

“Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she’ll give you a baby.. If you give her a house, she’ll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she’ll give you a meal. If you give her a smile, she’ll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit!”

Anyway, I think now that men know that a woman is defined by her relationships maybe that could be a starting point of “Understanding Women”. I know it’s not the easiest role but I think just as a man invests in his business and analyses the environment *SWOT*, so can he invest in the emotional side of a woman too. Make her world worth living – not necessarily just for spouses,I mean friends too.


“The woman came from a man’s rib. Not from his feet to be walked on. Not from his head to be superior, but from the side to be equal. Under the arm to be protected. And next to the heart to be loved.” ~ Unknown

That’s just spot on. I shall not add nor deduct.


Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*