I don’t know who got us believing that each of us has a soul mate out there that we’re utterly compatible with, that will complete for us our sentences, know what we want to say before we do, or know how we’re feeling without having to say it. That there could be a script written out for us on things appertaining to love, or who you’ll end up with. It’s good to believe in what you feel would be your ideal, but also great to be in touch with reality. Just like it’s good to imagine you can build castles in the air, but let that remain in your imagination.
You know when you’re given a wooden piece cube, and you look at it from its sack, it looks so easy-peasy to put the pieces together, only until you start arranging them and you realize, it’s not that easy. Or how you played Tetris on the brick game (#tbt) and worked towards having the pieces perfectly slip into each other to gain points and prevent the stack from overflowing, and when you start playing, it gets crazy and your stack keeps overflowing. It requires some time to learn, and some level of concentration and intelligence.
Or how we would be narrated to perfect love stories, which now sound absolutely ridiculous. Though they made us spend quite a substantial amount of time ‘day dreaming’ and thinking how we’re kissing many frogs and one will surprisingly turn into a prince, the soul mate. Or crush a party and expect a Cinderella-like turn up. That shoe story though, what if we analyze that situation. She could have been wearing an oversize shoe. You know how normally one foot is significantly smaller than the other. And when it got cold, contraction happened and the shoe slipped out as she run out to beat the curfew. And the prince, being a guy who’s totally fallen for this chic, decides to look for her during the day, with the excuse of returning the shoe. By then her foot had expanded enough to perfectly fit into the shoe – she must’ve been the only size 3 in the community. I mean, there’s many ways to look at it.
Haha, snap back to reality! That’s why it remains a fairy tale, preferably to be relived in the movies, because in reality, it’s doesn’t normally play out like that. Your relationship is like the whole dismantled wooden piece cube, and the wooden pieces are a means to ensure that you build something substantial out of it, in your own special way, but towards the same goal, something wholesome. There’s no formula as to how the pieces should be placed over or into each other, so you have to keep working towards getting it right. And when you do, you can be your method of making things work for you, you can decide to it the same way, or look for many other methods.
Some people are lucky enough to get it right the very first time, they just piece everything up. While others have to keep building and dismantling those pieces until they know each of them by heart. And eventually figure out how to make a perfect cube or rectangle, from the mistakes made previously – basically, how to make their relationship work for them.
Relationships are all about being proactive and learning, there’s no magic wand being waved or soul mate vibes. Just someone who is willing to understand, learn, love and live with you.
But before trashing it, do you believe in the soul mate concept? Or that girl/guy next door, with whom you will lay down the wooden piece cubes and solve that ‘relationship’ puzzle together, whether you get it right or you have to keep dismantling and rebuilding? To me, that’s what relationships are about.
Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*