Ever sat and wondered what drives you to do what you do every day? For me, it’s the promise of growth, the promise of change and the desire to be more than what I am at present.
I appreciate that I have been to a point where I had zero drive, and I realized early enough that it wasn’t the best place to be. Because you become complacent – you know, just comfortable with where and what you are, even when you clearly know that there’s so much of you that remains untapped. It eats you up and occupies your mind so much, that all you can think of is “how can I get myself out of here?” or “what can I do change the situation?” Ever been there? It’s as simple as knowing what you’re currently struggling with and working towards converting it to a victory, whether tiny or otherwise.
Of late, the one question that everyone has been asking me is, why I don’t drive (literally that is)? Besides the bit where I haven’t purchased a car yet, is the fact that the confusion on the roads gives me the heebie-jeebies. I remember telling the hubby while he was miles away that I felt bad that I wasn’t able to just get into the car and drive it. It was just there gathering dust in the parking lot, while my driving license is very valid and in essence, I know how to drive. It’s just the wild imagination that the road is a monster waiting to swallow me. I mean, what’s wrong with me? Everyone else just drives like they walk, it’s not rocket science. And the he says, “Just go ahead and drive it.” Honestly, I was waiting for him to say no, or give me ultimatums, and then he didn’t. That would have been my excuse.
So I decided to pick the car to go to church with it last Sunday. It took some serious internal confrontation. I even put myself to test, that if I wasn’t able to get the car out of the parking, then I wasn’t ready for this kind of pressure. I managed to get out of the parking and I wasn’t too shabby I must say. Then I drove on the highway and all the way to church, and parked again. I can reverse park people! I was also afraid of finding driving a burden or a task, I wanted it to feel natural. And by the time I was getting back home and reverse parking (you heard that right) into the parking space, I knew this driving thing had nothing on me. To say the least, I was proud myself as tiny a feat as this might seem. I also thank God I didn’t crash into anything.
I had pushed myself. Now, I want that car!
The thing with pushing yourself, is that you get surprised at what you can actually do, especially when you have that innate ability to do it. Many are the times you are given a task (that masquerades itself as difficult) and you want to just throw in the towel and say, “I can’t do this.” But that thing that gives you a nudge, that thing that you can’t really put a finger to and say, “this is it,”, the thing that gets you saying, “let me just give it a try.” That’s your drive.
Happy Labor Day loves! Continue laboring with love!
Signing Off ~~~ *Kawi*